back-you are out of your gourd." They galloped most of the day, since
Jonkarta would not heed their cries for a break. He only called a halt when
the crumbled towers of Mercaptan appeared ahead. They all, with the exception
of Fighting Devil of course, rolled off onto the soft moss gasping with
relief. The thoats began to graze and the faithful hound, Rayona, woke up and
broke wind. They forgot their fatigue and ran for safety, all except
Fighting Devil who had no sense of smell. "Here is my plan," Jonkarta said
after the air had cleared and he had kicked the faithful hound's ass around
the moss for awhile. "We must take them by surprise since we are outnumbered.
I know a secret way in. . ." "Why surprise?" Meta asked, surprised. "Why
don't we just send Fighting Devil in like last time and blow them all away?"
"Because now they are warned. At the first gunshot they will kill my darlin'.
That must not be! We will slip through the upper stories of the deserted
buildings, which move they will never suspect." "Why not?" Bill asked,
getting more confused all the time. "Because these upper stories are
inhabited by the hideous white apes, giant fearsome creatures that lust to
kill."139 "Won't they lust to kill us?" Meta asked. "I suppose so,"
Jonkarta pouted. "I never thought of that. I know! If they attack your metal
warrior will kill them." "Smart. Explosions and bang-bang upstairs. The
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gruesome greenies will never notice that." "I can do it," Fighting Devil
said. "I have silent death-rays, coagulator rays that turn a body hard like a
hard-boiled egg, poison gas, that sort of thing. Want a demonstration?"
"Demonstrate on the white apes," Bill said. "Shall we do it before it gets too
late?" Jonkarta led the way. Into a ruined building and up the great
staircase, ever upward until they reached the full garbage pails of the top
floor. They made their way through one room, then another-and found their
nemesis in the third room they entered. "There!" Jonkarta shouted
fearfully. "The hideous great white ape. Kill!" "White ape indeed!" the
creature roared back. "And that from you, you red commie bastard. I'll give
you five of the best where it will do the most good!" "Wait," Bill said,
laying a restraining hand on Fighting Devil's gunbarrel as it surged
malevolently forward. "Don't fire yet. That creature appears to be able to
talk." "Creature indeed! And who are you to come barging into a man's
parlor with a murderous looking machine and this red idiot. And a fair young
colleen, I must admit, to make the party complete." "Kill!" Jonkarta
ordered and the murderous form of the ten-legged hound hurtled forward.
"Down," the white ape ordered. "Heel. Nice doggy. Here's a bone for you." The
skull of a thoat140 dropped to the floor and was instantly seized by
Rayona and a great crunching followed. "My name is Meta," she said,
stepping forward. "I hope you don't mind our barging in like this." "Not at
all, not at all! An Lar is the name, but my friends call me An. Or Lar. Or
An Lar. The wife and kiddies are out shopping. We're having roast leg of green
Barthroomian tonight and you can join us if you like." "Why thank you.
I'll ask my friends." She spun about and glared at Fighting Devil who sulkily
retracted its weapons. "As you can plainly see these so-called white apes are
human-or close to it." "Human we are, without a doubt, may Samedi strike me
down if that's not true." "Samedi?" Bill said, dim memories surging up from
his rusty synapses. "Somehow, familiar. A friend of mine used to talk about
Samedi. A Trooper named Tembo." "Named after St. Tembo, bedad, one of the
holy saints of The First Reformed Voodoo Church. And where is your friend
now?" "Here. Or at least part of him is. He was killed in action. I
lost an arm in the same battle. This is his arm, all that was left of him. It
gives me something to remember him by." "Well sure and put it there!"
Bill's left arm shot up of its own volition. "Faith and I was wondering why
you had one black arm and one white arm, both of them right arms at that, but
I didn't think it polite to ask. Come in, all of you, it's a rare thing to see
a friendly face these days. Sure and it was a black day when the ship crashed
on this accursed planet." "Ship? Crashed?" Bill echoed. "Aye. A great
spacer packed with refugees from141 the planet Earth, if you can believe
the old stories. It is said that it was on this ship that the great conversion
took place. Although those who boarded were of many religions, when they
disembarked of religions there was but one. Due to the zealous missionary work
of St. Tembo, hallowed be his name." "That's what Tembo always said," Bill
said. "That Earth was destroyed by an atomic war, at least the northern
hemisphere was." "Sure and tis nice to have a little verification of the
old stories. Myths the youngsters call them-and they sneer. But it's no myth
that we are stranded on this barren planet. We raise a few potatoes in the
roof gardens, eat a green Barthroomian or two when we get hungry. Begorrah and
it's a rough life-made even rougher by the likes of him calling us apes!"
"I'm sorry. As a Southern gentleman ah do apologize. just repeating what I
heard." "Shows just how wicked rumor can be. But tell me, what brings you
to our fair city?" "My fiancee, the lovely Princess Dejah Vue, has been
captured by the foul creatures that lurk below. We must free her!" "Well
you have come to right place, boyo, if it's a little freeing and green
Barthroomian bashing you want. And besides, the meat locker is empty. You just
wait here, give another bone to that starving hound, and I'll be back in three
shakes of a thoat's tail." "He's nice," Meta said after their host had
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swung out of the window. True to his word he was back almost as quickly as
he had left, but his great white brow was puckered with worry.142
"Begorrah and it's not going to be that easy. I think they know that you are
coming?" "What makes you say that?" "Signs saying To the kidnaped
Princess all over the city. Tis me firm opinion that they'll be waiting for
you." "That's the way I want it," Jonkarta said grimly, resolutely
clutching his sword. "If they think they can capture me then they won't harm
her. So we attack." Meta was shocked. "You mean walk right into the trap?"
"We have no other choice." "He's right, we have no choice,"
Bill and An Lar intoned together. "That's what you male macho morons say."
Meta's lips curled with well justified disgust. "But speaking from the female
point of view I say reconnoiter first. There is always plenty of time to die
later." "No," Fighting Devil boomed. "Fight first, think later. I may not
be male, vegetative propagation is asexual, but by Zots I like this macho
talk. Let's go!" "All gonads no brains," Meta said disgustedly as they
marched out. She followed at a watchful distance and stayed in the building
above when they tramped out into the central square. "It is empty! They
have fled because they fear us!" Jonkarta cried out and the others cheered.
Then the ground opened up and they fell into the pit below while countless
green Barthroomians poured out of the surrounding buildings, shouting victory
cries and laughing and making obscene ges143 tures which, with four arms
working at once, are really pretty obscene. "Told you so," Meta sniffed.
"But no one listens to me." Then her heart fell and she clasped her hands
in despair. "Is it all over? Is this how life ends? Not with a bang out
with a green Barthroomian massacre and barbecue." She sighed tremulously
and the only sound in the room was the crunch of hideous might fangs gnawing
on a thoat bone. Followed by a hideous belch of satisfaction.C H A P T E R
15144Meanwhile, back in the city of metal, Zots was beginning to get worried. [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]